Today I am 39 years old. I feel not the slightest bit of concern, regret, or anxiety about this. And I confess, as I hover on the precipice of 40, I’m at a loss to explain why this should be something to worry about.
I know, of course, that our society has this thing about “a woman and her age”. And we joke about turning 40 and how it’s supposed to be some sort of depressing milestone. But I really just don’t get it.
Life is Good. I have a husband and two fabulous kids. A nice home, financially comfortable. I have my own business and am living my dream of being home with my kids.
But I think it’s more than “what have I done with my life” that causes so many people to feel depressed about turning 40. Obviously part of it is looks. Well, I think I look fine. I’m thicker around the middle than I was in my 20’s, and weigh about 20 lbs more, and I have rolls in places I didn’t know could get rolls…but overall I think I look great. I’m more pleased with what I see in the mirror than I was in my 20’s. Probably because I’ve put things in perspective. My body has grown and fed two children, a miracle that makes it hard not to love it, saggy breasts and all. My body is healthy, allowing me to participate fully in my children’s lives; I’m not handicapped or riddled with disease, so how can I not be thankful?
Then there’s the issue of Youth. Frankly, I find 20-something girls to be annoying, self-absorbed bimbos and I know I was one of them, lol. You couldn’t pay me enough to be 25 again. Don’t get me wrong – I loved my 20’s. It was all about me, life held endless opportunities, and I enjoyed a great social life. I was free in a way I never was at home with my parents, and never would be again. But still, I’ve been there done that and have no desire to go back.
I am quite proud to say I’m 39, though I admit I still feel a sense of wonder that I’ve been around this Life for so long. I wouldn’t consider the question of my age to be any more offensive than what is my sign or what is my favorite colour. And I guess this is what I am the most proud of, that I am 39 and *happy* being 39.
So Happy Birthday to Me!